[0:00] This episode is going out in the middle of the school holidays, and if you need a pep talk right now, this is it. You're listening to the Life Friendly Business podcast, where we lift the lid on the reality of running a business around family life and shine a light on the mindset gremlins which may well be stopping you from stepping into your zone of genius. I'm Erin, in, the Life Friendly Business Mentor, and I'm here to empower you to succeed through personalised support, strategic business training and ongoing mentorship. Let's work together to champion your goals and ignite your potential so that you can create your very own life friendly business.
[0:50] I want to talk to you today about trust. Trust in yourself and trust in the universe. Don't worry, I'm not going to get really woo-woo, but this is something that has made a huge difference in my life. And I genuinely think that where this really became apparent for me was during COVID and the lockdown, because we were forced to slow down. And we were forced to spend much more time on our own, reflecting on our own thought. And it made me really recognize my energy, both physical energy, but also mental energy. I realized that I was able to then, because I could feel it and hear it and see it technically, I was able to then lean into my energy levels. And suddenly I became so much more productive when I realized that I did not have to push myself and put pressure on myself to get loads of stuff done when I really, really didn't feel like it, when I was tired, when I didn't feel in the zone. Because if I allowed that, it meant that then I would come back out and I would get in the creative zone and I would actually be way more productive.
[2:19] So that gave me trust that it's okay to slow down. It's safe to slow down because I know that I will bounce back even better. And right now, we're in the middle of the school holidays, you might be feeling like you've switched off so much that you're starting to worry that you might never get your business mojo back. If this is you, I would love you to let me know because this has been me. This has been one of the hardest things that I found about, you know, slowing down the business during school holidays because you're kind of caught in this thing where you are are at the point where you don't want to switch off and it's quite a hassle to get everything ready so that you can switch off. And then you find it hard for a while to switch off. And then suddenly you do switch off and then you worry that you're never going to get it back again and that you don't care enough anymore. And, you know, we go into a bit of a panic. The fact is, is that it will come back. And actually you're going to be much better off from having that time where you have been able to switch off and let your brain rest.
[3:32] One of my favourite books, I'm sure I've mentioned it on here before, is Do Less by Kate Northrup. And, you know, she just talks about the fact that we have had it so drilled into us that we always need to be being productive and that that defines our worth. And of course that's crazy and she gives the analogy of farmers know that they need to leave the soil to lay fallow so that it's then ready for a new crop and it will make you know a better crop because the soil has had time to lay fallow and she talks about the fact that you know we expect ourselves to be having this bumper harvest all year round without any time of laying fallow and it's a really really good book and it really makes you think about this kind of pressure that we put on ourselves to always be doing and sometimes we just need to be that's what we need to do and it's so hard with all the social stuff or the mobile phones social media to allow ourselves just to stop actually I heard a great tip Rachel in my lovely membership she came to the CEO day, and she is a coach for people with neurodiversity. And she was saying about how with ADHD, sometimes it's actually really hard to sit still. And so what people do is they do finger knitting or, you know, knitting or fiddling with fidget toys.
[5:00] And actually, that can be a great thing to do rather than be sitting scrolling on your phone. And she was explaining that, you know, often find it hard not to do something with your hands. So the easiest thing is to pick up your phone, but instead you could be doing some knitting or something like that, which I thought is a really great idea. But yeah, this feeling that we just always have to be doing something. And one of the things that I know goes around for so many people is that feeling of, you know, what if I never have enough time to build this business in the way that I want it to?
[5:33] And I think this is where we really need to just trust that right now it might feel like that, but it's not always going to feel like that. And we are in business for the long term. You know, it takes a while to build up the foundation. It takes years. Sorry, I should say not a while. It's years to build the foundations of your business. And, you know, if you are building this business around your children as they grow, it's going to be getting stronger and stronger. And, you know, this is what we all want. We want to create this business that grows with us and that we can evolve and scale as we have more time as well, as we have more headspace as the kids get older. So we need to trust that even though right now we're feeling really time limited, that that won't always be the way. And it's the same with what if I never reach my financial goals? Having that trust that right now it's feeling hard, but we have to keep going. I hate the fact that online there's so much messaging that makes you feel like you should be able to earn big bucks super quickly. And that's not been my experience and it's not been the experience of anyone that I have come across in the business world for the last 16 years.
[6:58] Now, I don't say that to you to depress you. This is the reality. The reality is, is that running a small business takes time and it is an accumulation of all the effort that you are putting in and all the things that you are doing to move the needle in your business. It's not about overnight success. So right now, you might be worried about reaching those financial goals, but trust that you will reach those financial goals. But you need to think about the steps, focus on the steps rather than the end goal. What are the steps that you're going to take in order to get there? I really love the Tony Robbins quote about, we so often overestimate what we can achieve in a year and we underestimate what we can achieve in a decade. I'll say that again we overestimate what we can achieve in a year and underestimate what we can achieve in a decade so often we can be in such a rush to make progress and you know create success that we're all we're thinking about is the year ahead and we feel like we're never quite catching up with it but actually think about things over a longer period of time and recognize the progress that you are making.
[8:15] When it comes to trusting and trusting in ourselves and our ability to make this business work, one of the things that's so hard is when everything is so noisy around us, you know, like noisy in terms of the business, noisy in terms of the people that, you know, that we're looking after, our kids, family, friends, the world, everything. So we need to find a way to quieten that noise so that we can hear our own thoughts and therefore learn to trust ourselves and trust our guts more.
[8:51] And, you know, all sorts of things that we can be trying to do that, you know, really being your own gatekeeper. And if social media is filling your head and keeping your brain whirring all the time and maybe even making you feel crap, then we need to do something thing about that we need to decide that we are going to protect ourselves from the stuff that makes it hard for us to hear our own inner thought we need to allow time for clarity and you know when i talked about the story about during covid when i learned more about being able to lean into my energy levels in in the way that i was working what i realized is that you know the more space i I create in my week, the more creative I am, the more resilient I feel, the more productive I am.
[9:48] So it's kind of, it feels counterintuitive because it feels like, you know, well, you need to keep busy. You need to be busy because that means that you're running a successful business. But actually, it doesn't necessarily mean that you are performing at your best. And we all know about the dangers of going into burnout and things like that. Whereas if you block white space into your diary and don't overcommit, then actually you're able to function at a much higher level. So I can get so much done in a few hours that it actually doesn't matter if I don't work for the rest of the day. And this is a huge mindset shift. This really is a huge mindset shift. but it really works so I'd love you to experiment with this and and and you know I talked about energy levels so we all know that some days we bounce out of bed and we feel amazing and you know just our brain is just coming up with all these ideas and like and the problem happens and we can just solve it and it all feels amazing.
[10:55] And then the next day, you're really tired. You just say, oh, my goodness, I can't face today. You get one bad email or it's not even that bad, but it feels bad. And it just throws you and you're just not in the right headspace. What would happen if you actually allowed that and were able to bend your work around that so that you weren't forcing yourself to work in that state? And of course, there are lots of things that we can do to try and change that state. when we wake up like that. My favorite thing is to go and work somewhere else, change my environment, take myself off, have caffeine.
[11:33] It might be going for a walk. It might be listening to a podcast. But the point is, is that if we are just expecting ourselves to perform every single day, every hour of the day, not allowing ourselves time to rest, why are we doing that to ourselves? The reason that we've all started our own business is because we probably want to be our own boss and we want flexibility, and we want to enjoy what we're doing. So if we are whipping ourselves to work, even when our body and mind are begging us not to, why are we doing that to ourselves? And just to be clear, if you're scheduling space into your diary for the week, that does not mean you are lazy. It actually means that you are incredibly savvy, and you will notice the a difference in how you are able to perform in your business when you are more rested, when you are less overwhelmed, when you are much more careful about how much you are committing to.
[12:34] When you work on your own, it's so easy to get caught up in the doubt, the self-doubt, the inner critic telling us that we're not doing enough, that we're not good enough, we're never going to be enough. And we really have to be careful about those messages that we are feeding to ourselves as well. So I would really love you to work on trusting yourself and trusting in yourself, knowing that you are making the best decisions you can with the information that you have, knowing that you will get to where you want to go, knowing that it will all get done and knowing that you have done enough.
[13:21] One of the things that I speak to people about all the time is allowing yourself to feel that you have done enough at the end of the day and that it is okay to turn off your computer and switch off and try and do something else in your life because your business will never be done and that's a great thing that means that you've got a business but it also means that we need to put in the stops for ourself so know you have done enough for today it is enough whether you have managed to work 30 minutes four hours eight hours whatever it is just keep telling yourself you have done enough give yourself that grace tomorrow is a new day and as long as you are being focused with the actions that you are taking you will still be making progress I hope you've enjoyed this pep talk see you next week.
[14:19] Do you feel like flexibility needs to come later down the line? Perhaps when you've replaced your old salary, when you've hit a certain number of subscribers, when you're enjoying consistent 5k months. Don't make the mistake of going all in to get to a certain level of success and then trying to make your business life friendly. Because the truth is, is that life friendliness can be baked in from the very beginning. You can make changes now, no matter where you are in your business journey and still strive for success. Building a business is a marathon, not a sprint. And rather than being overstretched, overwhelmed and overcommitted, I'd like to help you enjoy the journey. Check out the Life Friendly Business Blueprint online course and make strides to transforming your life and business. You can find it at lifefriendlybusiness.com forward slash blueprint.
